isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
