I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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