Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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