u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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