Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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