Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
