Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
