Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
