you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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