DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize