i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
