Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
