No awkward lesbian experiences without me
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
