She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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