Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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