Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
