So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Randomize
