Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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