woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Randomize
