I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Randomize
