I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
