I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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