so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
