my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Randomize
