Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
