You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
