So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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