Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Randomize