dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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