Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
ugly people sure do ruin things
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
