Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize