small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Randomize
