I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize