Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I love you. Go after that dick
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
