nut hugger
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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