my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
She announced her abortion via fbk
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
