It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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