He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
