Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
