he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
You need a sexual gate keeper
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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