the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Randomize
