Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
