Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
