My friends, they love my intelligence
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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