careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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