well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
