Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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