She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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