You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
