people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
He told me they were just razor bumps!
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize